Archive for Manipulation
Positive Influencer or Bulldozer?
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Excerpt from A-CHIEVE! (July 2011)
Do you use your power of positive persuasion or negative persuasion when selling your ideas and influencing your co-workers?
Check out our side-by-side comparison and evaluate yourself, or better yet, ask one or more co-workers, who will be candid and open with you, to objectively assess you!
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When Passion Turns Into Obsession
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Excerpt from A-CHIEVE! (May 2011)
With most everything in life, it’s all about ‘striking the right balance’ vs. allowing the pendulum to swing too far to the left or right. The same holds true in the leadership world as it applies to our strengths. If we turn up the dial too much on any one strength, oddly enough, that strength can quickly morph into a debilitating liability. Case in point – have you ever had the opportunity to work with colleagues who would generally be described as having “it’s my way or the highway” or “I’m right – you’re wrong” attitudes and when they don’t get their own way, they act out? And act out they do either overtly or covertly – from sabotaging your goals to misrepresenting your ideas to spreading malicious rumors about you to fighting you every step of the way. And even more confusing, while you’re observing all of their crazy behaviors, they’re adamant about having the best interests of your organization at heart and even take you to a place of martyrdom as they claim that they’re only fault is either caring too much or being too passionate about their work. Our advice – don’t be fooled! These colleagues are not passionate – they’re obsessed – and they need a healthy dose of ‘tough love’ coaching.
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Collaboration vs. Manipulation
Posted by: |Coaching Question: What is the distinction between being “collaborative” and “manipulative”?
We define collaboration as “the mutual engagement of participants in a coordinated effort to achieve a common end goal.” When building and nurturing relationships, we look for the following integrity-driven behaviors:
- Honorable and genuine intentions
- Collaborative spirit
- Company agenda advancement
- Add value and give first
- Transparency
- Long term, mutually beneficial
The definition of manipulation is “to change by artful or unfair means so as to serve one’s purpose.” (Merriam-Webster) The clues that we look for that point to less than integrity-driven behaviors would be:
- Dishonorable and disingenuous intentions
- Exploitative bent
- Personal/hidden agenda advancement
- Take first
- Opacity/opaqueness
- Short term, personally beneficial
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